My Computer Won't Boot! What do I do?!?

It's bound to happen to you sometime. You site down at your computer hit the power button (or open the laptop lid) and…nothing. Okay, maybe I didn't push the button hard enough. Oh right I have to press the Return key to wake up the laptop…

It's at that moment that the feeling of panic starts to set in.

No, wait, I'll press the power button again, I'm sure it will turn on this time.

No dice.

Now what? Curling up into the fetal position in the corner might be tempting, but that's not going to help you. Let's go through the things I do when I think disaster has struck me.

You did back up your computer didn't you?

First off, if you read (and took my advice) my first column, you have a backup of your computer right? Uh huh. Look, I know preaching isn't going to do much, but this is how you need to look at it: your computer will fail eventually. You can't avoid it. It will happen. Having a backup turns a dead computer from panic to inconvenient. For us Mac folks, Time Machine (you are running Time Machine aren't you?) backs up your computer continually. I know that my machine could implode and I might lose maybe an hour or two of work. I've been tempted to use a small external drive as my Time Machine backup drive so I can always have it around, but that can be inconvenient, so I have a redundant back up over the Internet using the service CrashPlan.

Check the power cord, then check again

Next check that power cable (and any other cable connected to the computer), is the computer plugged in. No, really, check. It doesn't take much to have a power cord pull just enough to break the connection. The cord can even look like it's in, but isn't fully seated. So, check. If you have a laptop, yes you might have the battery and such, but plug it into the wall just to be sure.

A lot of the time, that's all it is. Just a loose power cable.

Oh. That's not it? Hmm. Okay, let's keep checking.

Listen carefully

Now, when you press the power button, what happens? If the answer is "nothing" then the issue might be the cord or the power supply inside the machine (I'm going to be desktop-centric for a bit). This is not a bad thing. Power supplies are easily replaced. If you hear the usual computer starting sounds, but you don't see the familiar screens…is the screen on? Is the video cable plugged in? Sounds? Do you hear the usual chimes and stuff when you start up?

This is a step wise process. Notice that "panic" and "quickly" haven't been part of the discussion? First, panic just won't help. Second, this isn't a time sensitive endeavor. Unless there is an anvil hung from a fraying rope over the computer (in which case move!), nothing is going to expire or anything in five minutes, hours, or even days.

Give your machine a boot (CD)

If we're still at the oh… point, then let's start getting a little more serious about this. Now, you have your emergency boot disc right? No? Then let's make one. Yeah if your machine isn't booting now isn't the time to think "Right, I was going to make that boot CD…". Yes, you can boot from an original Windows or Mac DVD that came with your machine—if your machine came with one! More and more computers, laptops especially don't come with the DVDs already made for you, you have to burn them yourself. Which, again, isn't terribly convenient when you'll probably need them most. Just what is an emergency boot CD/disc? Just like the name implies, it's a CD or DVD that you can use to boot your computer from to check it for problems or at least rescue critical data if the operating system has decided to take a little vacation.

My preferred boot CD (or even flash drive) to have around is an Ubuntu live CD. It's a little geeky for many users, but the benefit to me is that it can boot a Mac or PC from one disc. For most people, and you're using a PC, the Ultimate Boot CD is highly regarded as a great solution to at least see if your computer will boot at all and check the hard drive. The instructions for downloading the disc image and burning the CD are on the Ubuntu and UBCD sites; I defer to them for better instructions.

Once you have the CD (or DVD) burned, you turn your machine on (this is working from the "something happens when you hit power" assumption), open the CD drive and put the disc in. On most systems, if there is a bootable system on the CD, then the machine will use that. For Macs, you need to hold down the "c" key until you hear the DVD drive running (you'll know).

Has your machine booted? Yes? Awesome.

Remember, geeks like treats. Might be time for bribery

I'm not going to walk you through fixing your machine or how to fix windows. There are just too many things that can do wrong. What I will say is if your hard drive appears, find a USB drive (or three) and copy critical files to it. Don't worry about programs, go for the My Documents/Documents folders first. If you feel comfortable, running a disk repair utility isn't a bad idea, but also at this point you can take a deep breath and sigh of relief. If your hard drive has appeared, your files are probably okay. Yes, you might have to re-install Windows or OS X, but that isn't hard nor does it mean that you have to wipe out the entire drive in the process. Both set ups have a "non-destructive reinstall" option that has saved my bacon on more than one occasion.

Lifehacker (one of my favourite sites for getting great tips) had a "How to Fix Your Relatives' Terrible Computer" article just before American Thanksgiving. I have no problem with any of the advice there, be forewarned that the article isn't intended for novice computer users.

If your machine boots, now is the time to bribe a geek friend to help you. I am very wary of places that say they can fix computers. I've heard lots of stories of over charges, rudeness, and other things even worse. If you have a Mac, I have to say that both the Apple store and MacStation (Yaletown especially) have very good reputations for doing things right.

Has this helped? I hope if nothing else, you've learn that you do have to plan ahead. Might not be the coolest way to spend an evening (burning boot CDs or making back ups), but neither is one trying to fix your computer.

Before I wrap up, I want to let you know that I will be having a contest next week for a couple of tech goodies. To enter you'll be asked to register and leave a comment. How about you practice for next week, by registering leaving a comment now?