Game of Thrones S05E05 recap and review: 'Kill the Boy' (Spoiler alert)
I hope you like awkward dinners. And ambushes. And dragons. It's the recap and review for Game of Thrones S05E05, 'Kill the Boy'.
Game of Thrones S04E05 recap
Welcome back, Dire Wolf Fans! Here you'll find the recap and review for Game of Thrones S05E05, titled "Kill the Boy". Spoiler alert, as you may have guessed.
Previously, on Game of Thrones... Ser Jorah Mormont is crawling back to Team Dragon Mama to present Daenerys Targaryen with the most useless bargaining chip of all time: Tyrion Lannister. I bet all he’ll end up doing is providing a rival to Daario the Lothario.
Jaime Lannister and Bronn are the worst secret agents ever, getting their cover blown within seconds of arriving in Dorne. Ellaria Sand and the Sand Snakes are ready to wage a four-woman war on King’s Landing. King Tommen Baratheon is in the doghouse after the Faith Militant imprisoned Ser Loras Tyrell.
Also, Melisandre put her mysterious moves on Jon Snow, in what was way more than just an HBO-sex scene; confirming for many their theories on who his mother is. Now, usually, I don't do this but, uh, go ahead on and break 'em off with a little piece of the remix:
As per tradition, it's the Mother's Day special. Okay, let's get into it.
Happy Mother's Day
Team Dragon Mama! Yes! Grey Worm is alive! She3PO is sitting vigil over his still form. No! Ser Berristan Selmy is really dead!
Daenerys Targaryen eulogizes Selmy to only Daario the Lothario and some extras: “‘Berristan the Bold’ they called him. He crossed a continent to serve me.” Daario suggests pulling back to the Pyramid District, then going full Baltimore PD on Mereen. Dani has other ideas: round up the leaders of all of Mereen’s great families... starting with Mereen's Dana White right here.
Since this is the Mother's Day special, she leads their asses down to the dungeon where she keeps 2/3 of her dragons. She tells them that a) she still controls them; and b) the dragons just might eat them. Half of those statements are true. Look, I'm sure Dani's monologue about who among the great houses are innocent and who are guilty is great and all, but I'm fixated on the dragons torching that one guy and eating him. I doubt I'm alone.
Daenerys says that the immolations will continue until the Sons of the Harpy are eradicated.
The dragons don't say anything –– they just eat the dude they torched.
The leaders of the great houses of Mereen are like, O_o.
I'm like, \m/(>_<)\m/
Daenerys does the coolest thing humanly possible: she walks away from the inferno without looking back at it.
Oop North, though, Samwell Tarly is reading some expositionary tweets aloud to Maester Aemon, about how Team Dragon Mama's hold on Slaver's Bay is really weak.
(Remember, Aemon is a Targaryen, though he's been a Crow since basically forever.) Jon Snow shows up for a meeting. Jon's like, "I need your advice." Aemon's all, "Great. I'm only here for two things: to give advice and to freeze my freakin' nuts off. The freakin' nuts are already frozen off. Look, just do whatevs. Half the Night's Watch already hate you anyway."
Aemon tells Jon, "Winter is almost upon us. Kill the boy, and let the man be born." I was hoping for a more violent interpretation of this episode's title. Does this make me a bad person?