Game of Thrones S04E06 recap and review: 'The Laws of Gods and Men'

Disorder in the court! Weirdness at the Dreadfort! Game of Thrones is back with 'The Laws of Gods and Men'. This is the recap and review of S04E06.

Tyrion Lannister
Tyrion Lannister is on trial for his life. This Game of Thrones S04E06, 'The Laws of Gods and Men'.

Game of Thrones S04E06: 'The Laws of Gods and Men' recap

Welcome back, Dire Wolf fans! Here you’ll find the recap and review for “Game of Thrones” S04E06, titled “The Laws of Gods and Men". As always, spoiler alert.

Tyrion Lannister gets his day in court in what will surely be a totally fair trial. Petyr Baelish has married Lysa Arryn, and they totally deserve each other. Sansa faces the prospect of marrying Robin Arryn, which is... ew. It's enough to keep one awake at night, if the overly-loud boot-knockin' doesn't do the job.

Brienne of Tarth and Podrick Payne are on their way to The Wall, as a victorious Jon Snow heads back south from the Frozone after spectacularly killing Tanner. Daenerys Targaryen is getting into local politics. Bran is getting into Hodor's head and controlling him like a giant kick-ass robot from "Pacific Rim". Tommen Baratheon is the new puppet-king. Ser Pounce is sleeping on top of a TV somewhere.

“Game of Thrones” is all about mothers, so it’s fitting that an episode always falls on Mother’s Day. The dads of Westeros range from absentee to cold to openly hostile toward their children, while the mothers do anything and everything for their kids. We have helicopter moms, stage moms, and even a dragon mom. So this one’s for all the mamas out there.

Cersei Lannister

Okay, let's get into it.

You can take that to the bank

Stannis Baratheon and Ser Davos Seaworth have sailed to Braavos, and apparently they stood like this for the entire journey:

Davos Seaworth, Stannis Baratheon

They're there to meet with the folks from the iron Bank of Braavos. Since this is a bank, they have to wait ages. This place totally looks likea bank, too: blank, shiny surfaces. Uncomfortable lighting. Purgatorial wait times.

Davos tries to entertain Stannis with pirate tales, but it's not working. Oh, finally! Tycho Nestoris Mycroft Holmes sits down to talk about a loan, but it's not looking good. See, Dragonstone produces nothing (except for toughness and the occasional act of sexy witchcraft), so Stannis is not exactly a sterling candidate for a loan. Mycroft tells them to rhymes-with-shuck off, but Davos steps in to argue for his boss.

Davos tells Mycroft that the Iron Bank can recoup the money it has sunk into Tywin Lannister's nation-building campaign only by backing Team Sexy Witch Religious Fundamentalism. What happens when Tywin dies, asks Davos. Tommen is "a half-grown boy, the product of incest", after all.

Also, everybody hates Cersei Lannister; and Jaime Lannister... well, his nickname is "Kingslayer" It doesn't invoke trustworthiness.

On the other hand (as it were), Stannis Baratheon is a bona fide badass who walks the walk. Dude should be in the next "Expendables" movie. Also, Stannis keeps his promises, even when it involves cutting off a friend's fingers.

Ser Davos Seaworth

Davos then visits his mate Salladhor Saan, who's entertaining a couple of hotties in a hot tub. HBO can work nudity into a bank scene. Salladhor entertains the ladies with an old pirate joke.

Davos plunks down some money and hires Salladhor to come back with him to Dragonstone. Turns out Davos convinced Mycroft Holmes to cough up some cash.

So, yeah, Salladhor just got cockblocked, but it's one of the more lucrative cockblocks in recent memory.

Who let the dogs out?

The Sea Bitches! Yara Greyjoy and some Ironborn warriors are en route to rescue Theon Greyjoy. Yara reads Psycho Hobbit's letter from last season, the one that accompanied Theon's johnson. (It was like when you order something from Amazon, and they send a much larger box than is needed.)

There's Psycho Hobbit, the very poster child for contraception, enjoying a bit of HBO-sex as the Sea Bitches silently row up to the Dreadfort...

Ramsay Snow, Yara Greyjoy

The Sea Bitches ninja up the castle walls and take out the guards with "Splinter Cell"-style stealth moves.

Theon Greyjoy is being kept in a cage along with the other dogs. Yara smashes open the cage, but Theon thinks this is all part of some Psycho-Hobbit test. He keeps insisting his name is Reek.

Yara is clearly thinking, "WTF? He's only been here for, like, maybe two months."

Psycho Hobbit and his henchmen rush in. Hobbit is covered in blood, speaking to his sexual proclivities.

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