Why I Love Canadians "The 1st in a Hundred Part Series."
Reason Number 1. Crosswalks. Canadians not only invented the concept of a hard-to-see marker painted across busy roads which give pedestrians the right-of-way, but they really brake for them. This is a wonderful Canadian quality, putting those most vulnerable first and taking care that they can get across the street, without having to bother with a costly traffic light to manage things.
In Manhattan, where I used to cross streets, I would not have walked right in front of oncoming traffic anymore than I would have thrown myself in front of bullet train. This is because I value the sanctity of life.
My life.
Motorists in Manhattan rarely show signs of valuing the sanctity of life.
In fact, they seem hellbent on mowing pedestrians down. Pedestrians are too wily for them, in most cases, however, and develop strategies for stepping in front of cars to get a one uppance over the driver, and nimbly dancing out of the way, just before the bumper makes bodily contact.
Drivers in Vancouver do not attempt to make bumper to body contact. If they do so, it is a mistake.
My friends say I'm having a honeymoon with Vancouver. Amongst themselves, they whisper that this romance will not last.
One cynic I know proposed that I am so in the first flush of my Vancouver love affair that I have convinced myself that drivers in this wet and windy city always brake and that I am safe when I am, in fact, in grave danger of losing my life every time I use a pedestrian crosswalk.
This person asked to be named on my life insurance policy. I don't have life insurance. But I trust Canadian drivers.
I believe I could, for instance, bend down and tie my shoe right in the middle of the pedestrian crosswalk, and the good Canadian motorists would politely stop and wait until I completed my task. If, while I tied my shoe, I caused a traffic jam all the way up Granville, I am certain that here in Vancouver drivers would simply stick their heads out of the windows and apologize to me.
Once, when I was strolling in a crosswalk, a driver went right through, nearly flattening me. I am a proud Canadian-in-training, so I ran after the car, using my old skills as a New Yorker to avoid making contact with bumpers, and I shouted after the murderous, and obviously not Canadian driver, "I'm sorry!"
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(1) Comments
I love sorry....Sorry!
Americans and also people from other parts of the world find this trait funny when I apologize! Sometimes they don't like it. I sound weak because I show my weakness in the complete knowledge of the other's experience. But doubt expresses that I don't have the whole picture, the other person is their own distinct entity. I may not know something important.
At the same time, generally when I cross the border into the Unites States I feel a sense of euphoria! The more casual and open way of communicating is so freeing.
Yet to be really strong, we must admit that we are all weak - I think that is how we feel and it is also an American ideal too I think. Getting the kitten out of the tree... lending a helping hand. I associate these qualities with the United States, even New York where I am never looking lost for more than 1 second without a greeting and help.
I have one particular American friend who won't allow anyone to apologize in her company!
I have found my travels to America be always filled with a warm camaraderie that reflects the same ideals. But sometimes I also notice that people don't admit when they are in a tough situation. People push ahead and don't talk about the bad.
I feel scared here in Canada when people don't stop to perhaps apologize, even needlessly! I want the other person to be looking out for me the way I try to do the same thing. When I come home I can take a deep breath and relax because I am accepted for who I am, vulnerabilities and all. I would hate to live in a world where sorry disappeared. I suspect that all of us - from whatever country feel the same way about returning to the place we are both familiar.
Sorry! Is also a Canadian board game.
One American friend I have refuses to allow anyone to say sorry in her company. She thinks that we are apologizing for ourselves in a way - that we assume that we must apologize for ourselves. I like attempting to unlearn this ingrained habit while she is here. But I am also grateful for this habit that we must have imbibed from the Brits.
I have some friends who recently immigrated from New Orleans. She noticed that Canadians are more thoughtful and critical of the political process. I think what that really means is we also expect our politicians to have good manners and anticipate an apology in advance. "You guys complain a lot", she said. "But I guess that is why things have stayed nice to live up here." I notice that I always light up when I see her - she was totally positive all winter while we all ranted (wait till winter #3)!!! I don't think the apology syndrome is always fun. But I do think that being constantly aware of the vulnerabilities of others allows us to defend those vulnerabilities in times of need. We will put our money behind it in taxes.
So, without an apology... Sorry! Or perhaps Salute!